Thursday, June 21

A whole new world (Publish Old Drafts-2018)

21/1/2018
Amazing. These 2 years

I have seen people
- who is just an executive but bought a house and paying installment for it every month
- who failed all her SPM subjects and having no choice but to become a receptionist for 5 years
- who relies wholly on RM800 internship fee to survive and have to eat RM2 rice with only 1 dish (vegetables only) everyday
- who would give up and say no to things that given free to him when he truly needs the thing
- who works and stays as executive for 10 years, day in day out doing the same thing, and doing mindless things on weekends
- who has never read a book in life and who is totally clueless about what is 'knowledge' (completely fail in epistemology)


Story Time (Publishing Old Drafts-2012)

May 2012
Woot Woot, Tune to Allen's FM. Story time again.

A deep breathe. A great relief.
Finally I clear two huge events on hands, that have been following be for almost half a year.

First, Pesta Kebudayaan Bestari (PKB).
As head of Sales and Expo, and more unique as one of the drummers of Chinese 24th Season Drum !
The experience was awesome.
It was a success, I believe, with lots of compliments.
And more importantly, it served as a great platform for all of us, the first year students, to form intimate bonding.
I love PKB, I love 4th college. Please let me continue staying here for the following years !

Next, QuanBian (全辩)
A place that I hated so much at first, but the feeling turned 360 degree at the end.
Worked in publicity group. This is where a place that has broaden my sight and vision for so much.
Holding a debate competition, is like entering a military army base.
You will be attacked and killed at any time, even if you just made a significantly small mistake.
We survived at the end, with wounds and scars.
Two years after, I will be back.


The Importance of Suit

6/9/17
The scene below in the Spiderman movie has replayed in my minds for many times.


The Ironman gave the Spiderman an advanced Spiderman suit with technology. Spiderman wore it and did some stupid things almost killing many civilians. Ironman now wanted to confiscate Spiderman's suit.

Having tried the amazing technologically advanced suit, Spiderman was of course furious about the confiscation. His nerve cracked and he reacted to Ironman:
"No! Please don't. I am nothing without this suit."

Ironman responded:
"If you are nothing without the suit, then you probably shouldn't have it at all in the first place."


The scene really made me wonder:
People who possess strong ability will do amazing things
(Spiderman gets the suit then become stronger)


or

People who attempt on amazing things will get the strong ability?
(Spiderman works hard on becoming stronger then he gets the suit)



What does that mean?
- Many potential athletes say that they are not successful because they did not have good coaches and good training systems. If they have one, they would.
- Many wantrepreneurs say that they can't be entrepreneurs because they did not have capital/network/mentor. If they have one, they would.
- Many lonely people say that they can't get a good relationships because they did not have good physical outlook or charming traits. If they have one, they would.
- Many people say that they are not ABC because they did not have XYZ. If they have one, they would.

Lebron James has stayed in Cleveland for many years before moving to Miami. And almost every 1st pick overall in NBA has to play for the weakest team at first. Of course, not all of them shine, but some did.



Confidence (Publishing Old Drafts-2017)

23/4/2017
Beliefs and confidence are ghosts. They don't come from words, they are purely emotional and irrational. They come from genuine beliefs.

Remember those days when you were beaten down, how the people who loved you kept telling you things like these:
You can do it!
Common believe in yourself!
Just be confident!

And most of the time deep down in my heart I ignored what they have said. Because I felt that those words are useless.
"It's easy for you to say, it's hard for me to do it."

When you genuinely and whole-heartedly do not believe in something, any words will never change it. 

One single moment that proves how good you are will change everything.
- The guy or the girl whom you like showed interests on you
- That one important sport match that you beat a strong opponent 
- That moment seeing your fats going away and abs growing out

And you can only really feel the real confidence and beliefs after you have done it. Imagining them in your mind don't count. In fact, the more you imagine the end outcome, the more mental power you are channeling towards the outcome, then the more you obsess about it, the less confident you are.

So it creates one of the biggest and the most absurd catch-22 in our lives:
You need to first put in the work and then achieve it, then only you are willing to believe.
But you need to first believing it in the very first place, then only you will put in the work and achieve it.

Hard?

Genuinely believing that you can do it (the procress, the actions), not you can achieve it (the outcome the result later become how)
It is still very uncomfortable but u have to do it
Remove easy stuff and fun stuff

比较生命 (Publishing Old Drafts-2016)

25/4/2016
柬埔寨当志工,驾30分钟摩托,每一次都会在中途油站休息半小时,看向窗外,看到油站工人,看到有人挖沟渠,看到一大堆摩托司机顶着大太阳塞着车,开始想为什么每个人的命运都不同,生命的意义

一向来认为自己还有很多东西还很差劲,一直不断跟所谓的强人比较,要向他们学习,出身大学阶层。可我忘了有些人连中学毕业都是问题。How about the OKUs?人家说不应该跟差的人比,只会更差。但偶尔把眼角放宽,环视各种阶层,会让你了解到,走自己的路循序渐进就好,不要攀附别人。

如何面对人生遗憾?(Publishing Old Draft-2016)

25/4/2016
人生最大遗憾,就是错过了才领悟到那样东西,那件事情的真谛。

中学时学数学,觉得数学不怎么样,只是一个比较生动的科目,最后也不过是学习,不过是考试罢了。
现在发现数学的强大,奥妙。它所包含的逻辑思考,应变能力,大局观,深入明白背后存在的基础理论,和不断要比较不同情况不同案件然后要交互应用相对的理论和公式。

可惜好像有点太迟了,现在很少有机会在碰数学公式和理论
或许只是遗憾吧,遗憾中学学习为什么没有,应该是说为什么不能够珍惜和领悟
可以想象如果当时的我有今时今日的思想,我应该会多么地享受学习数学,那种愉快感

Hindsight is an unfair judge。
可是人生就是如此的特性,在向前看时,因为你不懂未来,所以会有彷徨,会有疑虑,会有负面能量减少你对事件的欣赏。
然后在经历了事情过后,你领悟得多,看得到大局
再(不经意地)用今天的身份和思想往后看,会觉得从前多么地笨,多么地惋惜,那些疑虑根本多余地可笑。

但用今天的身份往后看是不公平的。
人生就是每一步向前时,或多或少会有疑虑,犹豫,踌躇
这些负面能量让你的人生经验不完美,但更完整,因为它参杂了甜酸苦辣,五味XX

我们能做的,就是在向前走时,对那一份不确定性,那份风险,给予信心,给予更多的正能量,相信眼前的一切都是最好的安排,然后大步迈进。

Too many times of hindsight taught me that I should be extremely positive and march forward during foresight

Parents (Publishing Old Drafts-2016)

23/4/2016
My parents are world class parents.
They have never pressured me on study or result.
Allowing me to unleash my own talent and do things that I like
Open-minded and respecting all my choices.
Even in the toughest time they were able to deliver things that I need (Car, laptop etc)
Concern, love, care, accompany, respect, trust

Seriously, they are not the rich, not the successful, not the socially advanced, not the worldly noble, but they are the best in parenting, role model in parenting.

Thank you.